More Woke Jeopardy

Welcome back ladies and gentlemen, or non-specific gender term of your choice, this is Woke Double Jeopardy.

Just a quick reminder, check all common sense, rational thought, and proven data at the studio door. Here the subject matter is all about agendas, virtue signaling and outright falsehoods.

I’m your host, Al Bino, and my co-host is Sue Dointellectual. The contestants continue to be Blyn Defanddum, Gull A. Bull and Missy Enformed.

Bino: We left off with Blyn controlling the board. Go ahead, Blyn.

Blyn: Let me have Bitter Irony for $400.

Bino: The answer is, residents of Western Pennsylvania awoke on this Earth Day, April 22, 2021, to find a couple of inches of snow on their lawns.

(Chime sounds) Bino: Take it, Gull.

Gull: What is global warming?

Bino: No, sorry. Anyone else?

(Chime sounds again) Bino: You’re up, Missy.

Missy: What is climate change?

Bino: Correctomundo, Missy. Gull, you apparently forgot that global warming has been re-branded climate change, the better to include any outcome that is not exactly average (meaning just about everything on every day that is weather-related) as undeniable proof that man is making this planet uninhabitable. Make another selection, Missy.

Missy: I’m liking Unfathomable Utterances for $400.

Bino: The answer is, “Teenagers have been having fights including fights involving knives for eons. We do not need police to address these situations by showing up to the scene & using a weapon against one of the teenagers.”

(Chime sounds)

Bino: You’re up, Blyn.

Blyn: What did a genius activist post on Twitter in a weak attempt to say a policeman was wrong to stop a knife attack by shooting the girl wielding the weapon?

Bino: Amazingly, that is the correct answer. I may be giving away my age by telling you this, but I recall a time when a policeman would have been commended for saving the life of the potential victim of that attempted knifing. You’re still up, Blyn, make another pick.

Blyn: I’ll stay in the same category, Unfathomable Utterances for $600.

Bino: The answer is, “Defund the police.”

(Chime sounds)

Bino: Take it, Gull.

Gull: What is the virtue-signalling rallying cry of hoods, as well as professional athletes, politicians and celebrities who can and do pay for private security to protect their golden butts?

Bino: Very good, Gull. Well, we’re already out of time again – sorry for stealing your line, Sue – so we are going to Final Woke Jeopardy.

The category is Racism in America. The answer is, according to the official Black Lives Matter Twitter account, of the past two presidents, this one has been more guilty of terrorizing black neighborhoods by sending in military equipment.

(Furious scribbling by all three contestants)

Bino: OK, pens down. We’ll start with Gull, in last place with $300.

Gull wrote: Who is Donald Trump?

Bino: No. And your bet? $300, giving you zero. Next let’s see what Missy and Blyn, who are tied at $500, came up with. Missy?

Missy wrote: Who is Donald Trump?

Bino: Again, no. Your bet? $500. So you’re at zero, too. Well, let’s see what Blyn has.

Blyn wrote: Who is Donald Trump?

Bino: Wrong again. Your bet? Also all-in for $500, so you finish with zero, too. The correct answer is Joe Biden. We also would have accepted Sleepy Joe, Creepy Joe, Kamala Harris’ Placeholder, or Basement Guy. It looks like we have three zeroes for contestants, a fitting outcome.

Join us again next time for more Woke Jeopardy.