This Monday morning dawned with me informing the granddaughters, who are on a sleepover holiday weekend, that I was giving them each $1 million, promising them freedom forever from school or other unpleasant commitments, and guaranteeing them they could eat ice cream and sweets without needing first to eat their regular food.
Their eyes gleamed with joy. Then I explained to them the concept of April Fools’ Day, with all the attendant fibs, distortions and outright lies forgiven if followed by the admonition that it was just April Fools’.
I book-ended the whole experience by presenting the girls with some more Easter booty (this holiday has begun to rival Christmas in our household in terms of gift-giving). The girls were shown a three-pack of very nice kites that we will assemble and fly when weather next permits, and each child received a full-size fishing rod and reel (none of packaged kids stuff with short rods that make it much more difficult to cast or set the hook).
It occurs to me that the weird world events of our times would make for an entertaining game. I tell you about a news story (real or imagined) and you have to decide whether it’s legitimate, or just April Fools’ fare.
Ready? Let’s start.
Happy Easter. An El Paso judge on this traditional holiday ordered the release of illegal migrants who rioted and attacked members of the Texas National Guard because said illegals were unhappy at being thwarted at our southern border for processing.
Sadly, that one’s true.
Another Happy Easter. This sacred Christian holiday was chosen by decree from the Clueless Joe Regime to be, instead, Transgender Day of Visibility.
Again, sadly true.
As Major League Baseball began its Monday slate of games, the Pittsburgh Pirates at 4-0 were tied with the New York Yankees for the best record in the majors, and were ahead of the Los Angeles Dodgers (4-2) and their seemingly multi-billion dollar payroll.
Amazingly, true.
Fast-food workers in California who are employed by national chains with more than 60 national locations now have a $20 minimum wage.
Incredibly, true. Almost as incredible, even before this law kicked in, the average wage for food-service workers in California was $17.89 an hour.
Harry Potter author JK Rowling could be imprisoned under a new Scottish “hate crime” law. Her offense would be her penchant for insisting men identifying as women still are men, due to obviously biological truths.
You guessed it, true.
If only these all were examples of April Fools’.
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