In an homage to the fictional sports writer Dickie Dunn from the “Slap Shot” movie, filmed right here in Johnstown, I’m trying “to capture the spirit of the thing” by pushing the calendar and combining seasons.
An election looms and we’re already seeing Christmas themed movies on cable television channels, plus ads pushing just what to buy friends and loved ones to celebrate. Why not combine the two special days in song?
To do this, we fall back on our fondness for updating the words to popular holiday song standards. Today’s example is to be sung to the tune of God Rest Ye Merry Gentlemen.
The Democrats were counting votes
In their dishonest way
To alter tabs to get their wish
On this election day
They wanted to distort results
And lead the flock astray
Oh, why do they think we’ll buy this crap
Buy this crap.
Oh, why do they think we’ll buy this crap
From Hillary to Obama
They wink and give the nod
To tip the scales hard to the left
Ignore the one true God
They think voters are all but fools
And won’t catch on this time
Oh, why do they think we’ll buy this crap
Buy this crap
Oh, why do they think we’ll buy this crap.
The Democrats they count and count
It takes them many days
To hamstring Trump, lift up his foes
To leave us in a haze
We must insist on a fair count
And not ignore their crime
Oh, why do they think we’ll buy this crap
Buy this crap
Oh, why do they think we’ll buy this crap
So vote early and frequently
Just as the Dems plan to
We must beat them at their own game
To hold back the bad blue
It’s up to you to end their ride
And put them on the run
Oh, why do they think we’ll buy this crap
Buy this crap
Oh, why do they think we’ll buy this crap.
Merry election and Christmas, everyone.
Sam Ross Jr's site 