I noted a headline the other day that about 20 percent of Americans are illiterate, a number I suspect might understate the problem considering the anecdotal evidence I see each time I venture out on the roads.
It’s not just me. Last week, President Trump felt the need to institute an executive order requiring drivers of commercial vehicles to be proficient in English, thereby being able to read, comprehend and follow the rules of the road. That we need to have such a dictate speaks to the problem – pun intended
Today, I got my latest dose of seeming illiterates behind wheels. During a short run to Richland and back there were many such drivers, of vehicles private and commercial, big and small, that I encountered.
It can’t be that they are able to read and understand, but just ignore, right?
Clearly, at least half the driving populace sees STOP and reads YIELD. How else to explain the abundance of people who pull into traffic, oblivious to the STOP sign that marked their entry point?
Even if they perceived YIELD, it’s a stretch to pull directly in front of moving traffic.
These illiterates are similarly puzzled when a sign indicates the need to stop at a given point at an intersection, often accompanied by a wide, white line. But the dolts seem to think this marks the point the rear wheels should be lined up.
Left lane turn only, no turn on red, these signs also are misunderstood. Greek to the average driver, perhaps, or simply ignored.
Math dyslexia also must be very common.
Perhaps you, too, have noticed people who think a 15-mile-an-hour zone is 51 miles an hour. It follows that 35 is 53, 25 is 52, 45 is 54.
Only when the speed limit is 55 should these math dyslexics have no problem. Alas, tell me the last time you saw most vehicles observing a 55 mph speed limit, particulary on a four-lane, divided highway.
Back to my trip to and from Richland. I saw a moron in a massive white pickup truck who felt the need to pull in front of me on Eisenhower Blvd in the Krings area, then bumble along well below the speed limit.
Before that, I’d encountered a person so terrified by signs of an approaching lane closure, that he/she/it immediately reduced travel speed to 15 mph. About half a mile later, we actually encountered the tree trimmers and the lane closure.
One of the construction sign people was no Phi Betta Kappa, either, flashing the sign to proceed, then hurriedly spinning his sign to stop, totally confusing the timid soul ahead of me, before again spinning back to the proceed message. I can only imagine what caused that.
Fortunately, after pausing to contemplate a course of action, the vehicle ahead of me moved on in painfully slow fashion, only to turn left not much farther along Goucher Street.
Traffic lights seem to be similarly confusing. Red, the universal stop color, looks green to many, with resultant near-misses and harsh language.
This phenomenon has been with us for some time. I recall many years back, getting rear-ended by a belligerent woman as I stopped before pulling from Giant Eagle onto Goucher Street.
“What are you doing,” she screamed at me.
“Stopping at a stop sign,” I told her.
“No one stops at that stop sign,” she shot back.
“I do,” was my response.
Knowing such fools are perched behind steering wheels is enough to put one on high alert anytime the need arises to drive.
Also, like the overly dramatic and self-important female space tourists, there is an urge to kiss the ground after every successful mission/drive completion.
Sam Ross Jr's site 